Tuesday 26 February 2008

Whatever!

They say, as you get older the more your confidence grows and as true as that may be in some aspects of life, it's not true of others. Im going to be 40 this year and it seems im not as confident as i was say 20 years ago.Im starting to question the way i look, the clothes that i wear and the dreads that adorn my head! About 2 years ago, i started to feel this way, that i didn't know who i was any more, i kept questioning... me.. And so i took a pair of scissors to my waist length dreads and cut them all off.. At first it felt great but i soon started to regreat it, i even tried to dress more like a 'late 30 something', however that may be, but i felt wrong, i didn't feel like me any more and so, about 7 and half months ago i re-locked my hair and started down the neglete route... But im still fighting with this little voice in my head that keeps saying, ''your going to be 40 this year, should'nt you have grown out of this by now?'' But then i think, this is who i am and i don't want to change that, why should i change who i am because society says that it's wrong and thats not how we should be doing things, and so, i will put two fingers up to what they think and keep my head up high..
A friend said to me once, would i cut my locks in order to get the job i wanted and i replyed, but why would i?, if im capable of doing the job, then why would my hair be an issue?, if i was a coloured person with dreads would that still be an issue?, why is it so because im actually white? And if the person hiring me thinks just that then i wouldn't want the job in the first place.. Iv had dreads for over 10 years and its never been a problem job wise before, its not like i want to run for Prime Minister... is it?...
And what buisness is it of anybodies if i want to look a certain way, live a certain way, im not harming anyone, we should all worry about our own lives and how we conduct that, than what someone else is wearing whether that be their clothes or the way their wear their hair...
And so, 40 years of age or 80, im going to hold my head up high and embrace who i truely am!

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